Beginning at the beginning or the beginning of ends

I've been told more times than I can count that I should either do stand-up or write a book. Writing a book seems totally daunting to me. Entirely too much criticism by entirely too many people BEFORE it ever makes it to the public arena. I don't know if my fragile ego could handle that kind of rejection. Honestly, I've done the stand-up bit...sort of. If you consider getting me slightly drunk at fraternity parties and putting me up on the mantle and talking to other drunk people and cracking them up into hysterics as doing stand-up. Apparently I was good at it, because they had me do it on a regular basis. It didn't give me a salary, but, it did provide me with free beer, which, for a college student in the 80's was just about equal. Does that give me any credibility as a comedienne? No, it gives me credit as a college girl who liked to drink beer on Friday nights and talk too much, who other semi-drunk or drunk people thought was funny.

Could I do that today? No. First of all, I don't get drunk and stand on mantles anymore as a general rule. It just doesn't seem like a good plan. Secondly, I don't think I'm actually funny enough to earn a paycheck trying to do it. I do know people that will disagree with that statement, even though I tell them that they're wrong. I think I have moments where I'm funny. I understand and use sarcasm quite often. And, quite frankly, I'm a weird-shit magnet. If something weird is going to happen to someone, it's going to be me. Chances are that usually makes for a comical story. I also think I might not see things the same way others do, and that I'm usually able to find something truly amusing in just about any given situation. Even truly macabre ones, like say....funerals.

Yeah, funerals can be really funny. Maybe not so much for the dearly departed, though, I wouldn't totally rule that out. Wherever they are, I can imagine them watching their collected mourners and making comments like, "Marge, why in God's name did you wear THAT??", or "Dave, what is the deal with that TIE??", or "For the love of GOD, don't let Helen near the bar alone during the wake!!!" Truly a lot of room for humor if you look at it that way.

But, beyond that, things that I've actually SEEN, go sometimes beyond the scope of funny into the realm of just totally weird to the point of actually being afraid I'm going to get thrown out of *serious* places for laughing.

Mostly, though, I think I use humor to help me cope with the uncopeable, to deal with the undealable, to manage the unmanageable. I use that strange ability I have to find something, somewhere that can amuse me so that whatever oddity, or freak show, or tragedy doesn't turn me into a disaster while it's busy wrecking havoc all around me. I think THAT is what I do most with my odd~ball sense of humor.

So, friends, in this weird world of mine, there's almost ALWAYS something funny, no matter the situation, even if I have to look really hard, I am bound to find it...eventually.